In whatever state (or country)

When I was told that it wouldn't be a good idea to fill up a moving truck and drive it through Central America to our new home in Nicaragua, I realized that fifteen years of accumulating life would have to be sold or given away.  I processed this over the next few days as I walked around my house holding memories, and accepting the truth of my circumstances.  A sense of sadness lingered near the edges of my mind as I looked at the things that had brought me happiness.

Many years ago when Tim and I lived in our first house, there were numerous projects that needed attention.  Our two year old son had spilled a bottle of laundry detergent on carpet that was already in poor condition, and that blue stain taunted me day after day.  After pricing out new carpet, I realized that it was not something we could afford, and I would have to live in harmony with the ragged mess.  It became very clear to me that my contentedness was in jeopardy, and I had no way of fixing it on my own.  I knew I did not want to spend my time constantly wishing for something new and better.  I did not like the feeling of unrest that was filling my heart and making me bitter towards others who had more than me.

I remember one particular day as I was vacuuming the floors, a thought floated its way through my head.  I began to see my home with all of its lacking and need for maintenance as a haven for a blessed life.  God began to show me what I did have rather than what I didn't.  He was answering a prayer that had fallen from my lips as I asked him to bring me contentment.  I didn't need new carpet to make me happy, I needed the spirit of God to teach me that I already had what my heart was searching for.

I sit right now at a sweet little writing desk I bought just before we realized that God was calling us to another country.  I rarely buy things for myself, but this particular purchase felt like an investment.  It was symbolic of my dream to become a writer, and my desire and willingness to invest in that dream.  It is a place of beauty with its clean lines and quiet presence that allows me to lay my creativity upon it.  I have enjoyed its companionship, but very soon we will say goodbye.  There will be other desks in other places, and I will realize once again that contentment, happiness, and fulfillment in life will never be about what I have, but Who.

Philipians 4:11-13
"Not that I was ever in need, for I have learned how to be content with whatever I have.  I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything.  I have learned the secret of living in every situation whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little.  For I can do everything through Christ, who give me strength."


  1. You write beautifully.

    1. Hey there friend! Thanks for stopping by. It was so good to see you again. We'll have to make a habit of it.


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